STORY EXCERPT

Griff leaned in closer, so that his square face and hard brown eyes were only an inch away. He grabbed Raj by the front of his shirt, his fist pressing into Raj’s sternum. His muscles gleamed under a mist of dampness. “I want to know why you act like such a pansy all the time.”

His body was too close. Raj was getting a fucking hard-on. He was always a little turned on in the locker room, with its smell of sweat and deodorant and humid air. But this was way worse. He felt like his entire body was lit up like a sparkler.

Dragging in as much breath as he could manage, Raj said, “Why do you act like such a douchebag?” Raj wasn’t gay—at least, not so anyone knew.

“Pussy,” Griff spat, close enough that a droplet landed on Raj’s cheek. He pressed against him, his towel dampening Raj’s track pants.

This was new. He’d never gotten this close before. Through the layers of cotton between them, Raj could feel an unmistakable firmness poking his hip. Griff’s dick was hard. Good God, even if Griff punched him it would be worth it, because Raj would jack off over this moment for years.

“Maybe you’re the one who’s gay, idiot.” Raj kept his eyes trained on the floor, the way he had every time some thug fifty pounds heavier than him had decided to push him into a locker or shove him into a wall. That had happened a lot in high school. Less so in college—at least it happened less except when Griff was around.

“Dick,” Griff said. “I can feel your hard-on. So that means you’re a queer.”

“You’ve got a stiffy, too, moron.” Griff was easily the dumbest person Raj had met at Holsum College. Of course, at an Ivy League school, stupid was a relative term. But still…Griff was a linebacker on the football team and had clearly taken a few too many hits.

But what he lacked in brainpower, he more than made up for in bulk. Griff was only a freshman—same as Raj—but the guy was built like a brick wall. Maybe an inch shorter than Raj, but at least twice as wide. His teammates had already given him the nickname Tank.

“That don’t mean nothing. I’ve always got one.” Griff underlined his point by shoving the thing in Raj’s belly. Raj could feel Griff’s thighs, thick and muscular, weaving with his own.

He hadn’t known he could get any harder. His dick hurt, it was so erect.

“Are you going to let go of me?” Raj tried to sound as if it didn’t matter to him one way or another if the beefy football player ever let go of his shirt and let him get back to his job. “Or are you going to prove your heterosexuality some more by rubbing your dick into my—”

Griff crushed their mouths together.

The locker room was empty, and Raj only heard the hum of the exhaust system and the steady drip, drip, drip of the broken shower. He was so surprised to have a man’s face mashed against his that he could barely register that this was his first kiss.

He looked past Griff’s eyelashes at the gray row of lockers. Griff’s stubble scraped his lip, and he tasted…well, Raj guessed he tasted like skin and saliva. But it was better than that. Griff tasted like a man. Smelled like one, too. And Raj’s worst fears were realized in that moment, because as much as he hated Griff Parker’s guts, he wanted to kiss him for hours.

Raj tilted his head to kiss Griff back, but Griff pulled away before he could work his lips.

“What in the hell?” Raj blinked.

Griff paced in front of him. Walking three steps one direction, then three steps back in the other. He looked like a madman, shaking his head, talking to himself. Raj didn’t move lest he provoke the guy.

The messed-up thing was, Raj couldn’t tell if he was more scared or turned on. He guessed he was both.

“You should suck me off,” Griff said to the floor more than to Raj. He seemed confused, but Raj couldn’t stop watching him with fascination. Griff was like a science experiment. A volatile compound, and Raj didn’t know how he would react.

But no matter how horny Raj was feeling at that moment, there was no way he was going down on the guy.

“Fuck you.” He looked at Griff head-on. Staring him down was easy, since Griff couldn’t seem to meet his eyes. “You should suck me off.”

“Um…” Griff’s forehead creased as if he was thinking about it. “That’s not how this is supposed to work.”

Raj felt like he’d fallen into some rift in the space-time continuum. Was Griff really considering blowing him? Raj worried the guy would punch him in the nuts as soon as Raj got out his dick.

“I guess…” Griff frowned. Then he shrugged. “Fine.”

Griff squatted in front of Raj’s groin and tugged down his track pants. It was a testament to how turned on was beating out scared that Raj was hard as a rock.

“Um, okay.” He probably should have kept his mouth shut, but Raj felt the need to give consent.

“Good.” Griff opened his mouth and swallowed Raj down. He scraped the shaft with his teeth and gagged himself once before he found a tempo, but when he did…

Oh, God…When he was bobbing up and down, Raj was happy he liked men. He couldn’t imagine anything he wanted more than sweat and chest hair and cocks and balls. For once, he didn’t want to be something other than what he was. And that’s why he decided to stop being freaked out and just go along for the ride.

ADULT EXCERPT

Raj didn’t help him any. He just lay there like a cat in the sun, letting Griff struggle to get his shoes untied and his jeans off his ankles.

“You’re really not helping me out at all here.” Griff rubbed Raj’s bare calf, and when he got his other pant leg off, he massaged both calves in tandem.

“Nope. Not at all.” Raj stretched his arms over his head while Griff worked his way up past his ankles and to the backs of Raj’s thighs.

He took one thigh in both hands, massaging, rubbing, rolling the muscles under the flesh. Then Griff repeated the same with the other side. But when he tried to move higher, to the tender muscles right at his seat, Raj flinched.

Despite still wearing his underwear, that touch felt unbearably intimate. Like Griff was reaching right into his body.

But instead of backing off, Griff just kept rubbing circles. Most of his hands, and all of his fingers, were splayed over the expanse of Raj’s ass. But those clever thumbs kept brushing, as if accidentally, into the T where Raj’s crease met the tops of his thighs. Every time, Raj fought not to arch his back and chase those fingers.

Griff pressed a kiss to Raj’s back, right above the waistband of his briefs. Before Raj could even process how that felt, Griff kissed his way down, his breath warm through the cotton, the kisses light as butterflies, landing lower and lower.

Until finally, Griff’s nose was buried right in Raj’s crack, and he pressed kisses into the sensitive flesh at the top of Raj’s legs.

It felt good. So good that Raj opened his legs, letting Griff get those lips, that tongue farther into his crease. Raj knew what this led to. He knew what Griff was hinting. What he didn’t know was whether he wanted him to stop.

“Is this okay?” Griff asked, as if reading Raj’s mind.

“Uh…yeah.” Raj fought the urge to shove his ass in Griff’s face again. That had felt really, really good.

“We don’t have to fuck tonight.” Griff hitched his fingers over Raj’s underwear and tugged them down.

In a fitful move, Raj unhooked the fabric from his growing erection and shoved his briefs to his knees. In the process, he turned his head to the side and Griff’s lips found his, catching him in a kiss.

Griff fondled the space behind Raj’s balls, stroked along his crack, kissed him like they had all the time in the world.

“You should take off your pants, now,” Raj said as if in a daze. He couldn’t believe how turned on he could get just from a man rubbing his taint.

“Whatever you like.” Griff gave him a deep kiss and then pulled his pants off. When he got back on the bed, he crouched back where he’d been before, kissing and licking the crease of Raj’s butt, teasing his thumb deeper and deeper inside, until the spit and pressure were enough that the pad of his thumb pressed directly on Raj’s puckered hole.

“Oh, fuck.” Given how long Raj had known he was gay, he really should have tried playing with his ass more. He knew there were toys he could have used on himself and that a lot of gay men really liked getting rimmed. But for some reason he’d never wanted to think of himself that way. He’d always thought he’d be the guy doing the fucking, not the other way around. Though at that moment, he couldn’t quite figure out why.

“You got any lube?” Griff asked.

“Um…” Raj wasn’t sure how to answer that question.

“Not for fucking or anything. I just thought it would feel nice. I could rub it on you.”

“Oh.” Raj relaxed. He had to admit, he really wanted Griff to push that thumb inside. He probably could have done it fine with just spit. But Raj knew it would be easier, and probably a lot more fun, with some extra slipperiness. “Yeah.”

He reached for his drawer and dug out the small bottle he’d bought somewhere in the middle of his sophomore year. It was still sealed and was sitting next to a 12-pack of condoms he’d bought during that same trip to the pharmacy. When he’d finally admitted to himself he was really gay, he’d wanted to be prepared in case the opportunity to have sex arose. Of course, not telling a single living soul he liked men cut down on his opportunities to get laid.

“Great.” Griff picked it out of his hand and bit the wrapper open. He poured some onto his fingers.

Raj felt a twang of sadness. He’d always thought he’d break that seal when he finally hooked up with Cal.

But when Griff’s slippery fingers worked between Raj’s cheeks, the air whooshed out of his lungs. He panted, feeling a blunt pad of a finger pressing for entry. And it was too slippery for Raj to keep it out. Griff’s middle finger sank past his resistance, filling Raj’s ass with a stiff, fiery presence.

God, even just that much hurt a little, but it felt unbelievably good at the same time. And then Griff pulled almost all the way out, and then slid all the way in again in a long, slick push.

“Fuck, you feel so hot in there,” Griff said with awe in his voice. He pumped in again, fucking Raj with just his finger. “Is it good?”

Raj struggled to get out words. “It’s too much.” He licked his lips.

“Should I stop?” Griff kept his hand still, that rough finger still buried deep.

“No.” Raj shook his head. “Fucking—don’t stop until I come.”