STORY EXCERPT

Terry stormed into the house behind him and slammed the door. Mark cringed as the sound echoed throughout the bottom floor. Thank God this house was built well.

They had only lived there together a few months. Mia had rented her house to them when she had moved in with Vincent He and Terry had looked at the move as a new opportunity for them. But nothing had changed for them besides their address.

And now if he didn’t get Terry to understand, he may be moving his things out sooner than he had anticipated. He frowned at the thought. “Are you going to be mad at me all night?”

“Yes.” She slammed her purse down on the foyer table and wheeled around to face him. “Who was that guy?” Terry was a Sub, yes, but she was not a pushover. She was angry and needed answers fast.

Mark sighed. Time to come clean. He hadn’t asked her permission so now he had to start asking the love of his life for forgiveness. He took a deep breath. “That was the best trainer in Southern Ontario.”

“Try again, Mark.” Terry angrily shook her head. “The best trainer in Southern Ontario is my friend, Mia, who just retired.” She folded her arms across her chest.

“Well, I guess James didn’t really rank him as a trainer, he just said that he was the best and recommend him for us.”

“James recommended him? The guy who looked angry as hell when I came?”

“When you came? You haven’t had an orgasm with a partner in years.” Mark tried to take her hand, but she shrugged him off. His ill-timed observation hadn't won him any points in this argument.

“So James thinks that I need a trainer? That’s awful nice of James. I’ve been a Sub for years now. How dare he?”

“It’s not just for you.” Those five words had the ability to stop Terry in her tracks. She turned back to look at him and he could feel his shoulders falling.

There were so many things they should talk about, but never did. He should have told her how he was feeling before going to James. But he was so scared of losing her that he was getting good at keeping all of his pain locked up inside himself.

He could see now how keeping his feelings to himself hadn’t worked. If they had any hope of fixing their relationship, he needed to be honest with the woman he loved more than anything.

“Terry, I know we have problems. Everyone knows we have problems.” They looked at each other as the fight slowly left them both. This fight was just one of many over the years that went nowhere.

“It’s my fault.” She sighed. “Forget what I said before, I was angry. I have blocks, things that I’ve been trying to work through.”

Mark smiled weakly. “It’s okay, I know that I need help, too.” He followed her into the main part of the house. It was the most beautiful place he had ever lived. But he knew that having a perfect home didn't necessarily translate into the people living inside having a perfect life. Right now their relationship was as far from perfect as possible.

Terry flopped on the couch, as if she had no strength left in her body to stand. Her anger had vanished, leaving a trail of sorrow in its wake. She tried to hold in her tears but it was no use. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey, don’t cry.” Mark joined Terry on the couch and tried his best to kiss away her tears. This night was a bust. The scene had gone terribly, and their trainer had run from them. At least it got them talking.

“I think you’re amazing, Mark, so patient and so good with me.”

“Thank you, babe. I try. You’re the most important person in the world to me.”

“But…”

“You feel it, too.” It wasn’t a question, it was a statement. If Mark had felt like something was off between them, then Terry must feel it, too. Something was missing, and had been for a long time now. What she had said earlier was right, she was an experienced Sub. He was the one who had come to it late. She was in the lifestyle so he had followed her into the scene when they had first reunited after she was freed. It was important to Terry and the lifestyle turned out to be a good fit for him, too. He had found benefits in the type of play and discipline that BDSM dictated.

“I’ve been thinking, maybe we should leave the club.”

“You love it there!”

Terry shrugged. “But I love you more.”

Mark wrapped his arms around her. For more years than he could recall, Terry had been his everything. “You would give up the lifestyle for me?”

“Yes. For us.”

Mark shook his head, stunned. “But that’s nothing something you’ve considered before.”

“That’s true.” Terry shrugged. “But we’ve broken up so many times because of my inability to submit—”

“My inability to help you submit.”

“That I’m afraid…”

“That the next time we break up it might be forever?”

Terry nodded. “I don’t want that.”

“Me neither.” Mark out his arm around Terry’s shoulders and pulled her body against hers. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing her for good. Every time they had broken up he had fought his way back here by her side. He had worked hard to prove that she was important to him.

Her fears that this might be the end for them gutted him, but he couldn’t say that he hadn't worried about the same thing. It was that feeling that had motivated him to share their problems with James. Maybe he had gone about it the wrong way, but he was desperate.

“I’m sorry I went to James without talking it over with you first.”

“It’s okay, I understand now.”

He pressed a kiss to her forehead, grateful for her forgiveness. She closed her eyes briefly and then smiled. He knew that she loved him. No matter what issues they had, he never doubted her feelings for him. That was one of the only certainties in his life.

“Thank you, I needed that.” Terry patted his hand and stood up. They both had regrets they would live with for the rest of their lives.

ADULT EXCERPT

“Be still, Sub,” Mark commanded. His order went unheeded. When Stef lapped at the sensitive area again, Terry couldn’t help but arch her hips off of the bed.

Stef looked up at Mark. “Perhaps you need to give the Sub something to distract her.”

He nodded. ‘That’s a good idea.”

Terry watched as Mark unzipped his trousers. He reached inside and pulled out his cock, fully erect. Although they had played since her return, this was as close as she had come to real sexual intimacy with anyone. Sharing this experience with both Mark and Stef made it all the more special.

Terry opened her mouth wide as Mark pushed his cock gently between her lips. She had missed this, she had missed being useful, able to give pleasure willingly instead of it just being taken from her body. Her tongue swirled around him as Mark slowly thrust forward, then she moaned as Stef resumed his attention on her clit.

It felt overwhelming and fully amazing at the same time to be between these two men who cared for her. Oh Stef hadn’t said it yet, but she knew it was there. She could tell from his every action tonight and the past few weeks. Right back to their first session together when he hadn’t been able to take his eyes off of her.

Mark withdrew from her mouth as Stef sat up.

“Did you remember your homework, Terry?” Stef asked, his voice hoarse. “Do you have something that scares you?”

Terry held her breath. When she had been with Mia in the shop she couldn’t find one single tool that scared her. She knew all along that nothing made of rubber or silicone would ever harm her or give her fear. It wasn’t an inanimate instrument that scared her. It was actual penetration that terrified her.

She had enjoyed sex before, but any pleasure had been stolen away from her the first night she had been taken. She was afraid to give that part of herself to someone now that she was free. Although her panic attacks came less often now, she could easily have one that caused her to lash out at them. What if no panic came, but no pleasure came either? What if she had been rescued but that important part of herself could never be freed? These fears made her feel like she wasn't a woman any longer. How could she get that part of herself back? Maybe she owed it to herself to try. Terry took a deep breath. She felt safer here with both of them then she had ever had before. And a Sub’s job was to trust. She had told Stef that it wasn’t too late for him to be happy. Maybe it wasn’t too late for her either.

It was time for her to face her fear.

She lay back on the bed. Although she was using every ounce of her willpower to be strong, tears filled her eyes. “I want you to make love to me.”

Stef and Mark shared a look. “That’s what scares you??”

She nodded, embarrassed. She tried to hide her face, but it was impossible as Mark and Stef crowded her with kisses.

“Thank you for telling us,” Mark said softly. He really loved her and she had held herself back for so long. Yes, it was time to let him in and let go of the fear. She reached out and grasped his hand tightly. She would need his strength too to get through this.

When she looked back at Stef, she saw that he had quickly undressed. His body wasn’t sleek and trim and there was a thick blanket of hair where a model would have a cut set of abs. His body wasn’t up to the media’s standards, but to her it was perfect.

It had been a long time for him, too, since he had allowed himself to be this vulnerable.

The three of them each had something to lose. That’s what made them a perfect trio.

Kneeling between her legs, Stef’s cock nudged her entrance. He hesitated and she though he was going to ask again if she was sure. Instead he said, “Thank you,” and pushed inside of her.

There was some discomfort as she adjusted to having his heat inside of her. She felt every inch of him inside of her, stretching her, invading her body. While in captivity she had learned to dread this feeling. She had blocked it out and blocked out her reaction to sex. She was forced to comply just so that she could survive.

Tonight instead of making her feel empty, it made her feel full. These men weren’t here to hurt her.

So she allowed herself to feel.

Stef gave her some time before he began moving. The slow withdraw on her interior muscles. It was a unique sensation that only came from skin to skin penetration. He pushed inside again and paused. Sweat broke out on his brow. His willpower was charming.

Terry took another deep breath and waited. She expected the panic to roll in and destroy this moment.

But it never came.

Stef thrust inside of her again but stopped when he saw the tears rolling down her cheeks. He shared a puzzled look with Mark that intensified when she began to laugh. “I’m okay,” she cried. “This part of me is still mine.”